“Proceed with caution if you’re
tempted to have an office affair” says
infidelity expert Ruth Houston, who was
recently quoted in a Christian Science
Monitor article on office affairs and
workplace romance.
(PRWEB) -- “Proceed with caution if
you’re contemplating having an office
affair or workplace romance” says
infidelity expert Ruth Houston, who was
recently quoted in a Christian Science
Monitor article on office romance.
Experts say that over 70% of single
employees will become romantically
involved with someone on the job at some
point in their career. Research shows
that people are more likely to date a
coworker than anyone else. Today’s
workplace has becomes the new “singles
bar.” The workplace has also become the
#1 place for married men and women to
meet affair partners and conduct
extramarital affairs.
“As tempting as it may be to date
someone from work, the risks far
outweigh the rewards” says Ruth Houston,
infidelity expert and author of Is He
Cheating on You?” Houston was recently
quoted in an article in the business
section of the Christian Science Monitor
entitled To Date, or Not to Date by
Randy Dotinga. Further expanding on her
comments in that article, Houston
discusses some of the negative aspects
of office affairs.
Legal Complications
An office affair can cause you legal
problems as well as public
embarrassment” points out Houston.
Especially if your .workplace lover
becomes involved in a corporate scandal.
“You could be named as an accomplice, or
hauled into court as a government
witness,” says Houston, citing the
examples below:
• U.S. District Judge Barbara Jones, the
judge in the trial of ex-WorldCom chief
executive Bernard J. Ebbers, ruled that
star witness Scott Sullivan can be
questioned about his marital infidelity
because it speaks to his character for
truthfulness.
• Book publisher Judith Regan may be
forced to testify about her affair with
Bernard Kerik who withdrew his name from
Homeland Security nominee in the midst
of numerous allegations of personal and
professional improprieties.
• Testimony from three former mistresses
helped put Nathan Chapman away for 7 ½
years for defrauding Maryland's state
pension fund system and looting his
three publicly traded companies.
These are only three of the most recent
examples of how an romance may become
public knowledge, much to the
embarrassment of those involved.
In addition, males in supervisory
positions who have office affairs with
female subordinate run the risk of
becoming the subject of a
sexual-harassment suit if the woman
later claims to have been coerced or
pressured into the relationship for fear
of her job. For that reason many
companies now forbid romance between
bosses and subordinates. Others
companies require persons involved to
sign consensual relationship agreements
– also known as “love contracts” - which
state that the relationship is
voluntary.
Career Complications
”Aside from legal issues, workers
tempted to date their bosses should
worry about whether a relationship will
hurt their careers”, said Houston in the
Christian Science Monitor article.
"If it ends badly and you were involved
with someone in your direct chain of
command, very nasty things can happen,"
Houston says, especially if your boss is
married. "No matter how hard you work,
some of your co-workers will always be
convinced you got your raise or your
promotion as a reward for sexual favors,
rather than that you worked hard and
earned it."
Below, Houston further expands on some
of the day-to-day and long-range career
complications that can result from
office affairs:
• Envious co-workers may become jealous
and attempt to sabotage your work.
• Your productivity or the productivity
of those around you may suffer.
• You could become the subject of office
gossip
• If your office romance results in
preferential treatment with regard to
work assignments, raises, promotions or
company perks your co-workers will
resentment you.
• A series of office romances will earn
you a reputation as someone who tries to
sleep their way to the top.
• You may be transferred to another
department or even required to leave the
company, especially if you are a woman.
When an office affair becomes a problem,
it’s usually the woman who is penalized.
• It could create an awkward situation
when the romance ends, and the two of
you still have to work together.
• If you end the relationship and the
other person is vindictive, they can
sabotage your career in ways you can’t
even begin to imagine.
• A disgruntled lover can negatively
influence the kind of work assignments,
raises, and opportunities for
advancement you receive.
• Your coworkers’ perceptions of your
work performance may be lowered.
• No matter how good you are, there will
always be speculation as to the “real”
reason for your job advancement.
How to Keep Your Office Romance on a
Professional Level
“The best advice I can give regarding
office affairs is to avoid them
altogether, since the risks greatly
outweigh the rewards,” says Ruth
Houston. “If you’re currently involved
in a office romance, or you’re tempted
to become involved in one despite my
warnings, the guidelines below will help
you keep things on a professional
level.”
• Know your company’s policy regarding
office romance.
• Never get involved with someone in
your direct chain of command.
• Confine your romantic attachments to
someone who is a peer, rather than
someone above or below you in rank.
• Never get involved with in an office
affair if either of you are married.
• Never underestimate the power of the
office grapevine. Try to keep your
office romance a secret, if you can.
• Keep it low key – don’t flaunt the
fact that the two of you are
romantically involved.
• Avoid public displays of affection –
it’s highly unprofessional.
• Don’t gossip about your love life.
• Do not exchange embarrassing or
ostentatious flowers, cards or gifts.
(Small , discreet, tasteful gifts are
okay.)
• Do not allow your office romance to
interfere with productivity – yours,
your partner’s or your coworkers.
• Do not use company e-mail to send
passionate or suggestive love notes to
each other.
• Do not leave X-rated voice mails on
each other’s phones.
• Don’t show or request favoritism
regarding work assignments, raises,
promotions or company perks.
• Do not use company funds to entertain
your partner.
• Refrain from overt sexual behavior on
the job.
• Never engage in sex on company
property. (That includes stair wells,
supply closets and company parking
lots.)
• Have a back-up career plan in case
things take a negative turn. Be prepared
to find another job.
About Ruth Houston:
Infidelity expert Ruth Houston is the
author of Is He Cheating on You?- 829
Telltale Signs, a comprehensive guide
which documents practically every known
sign of infidelity. She has been quoted
in the New York Times, the Toronto Sun,
the New York Post, Cosmopolitan, the
Christian Science Monitor, the Albany
Times Union, the Pittsburgh
Post-Gazette, Marie Clair, First
magazine and numerous other publications
here and abroad. She has also been a
guest on over 100 radio and TV talk
shows in the US, Europe, South America,
and the Caribbean, including Good Day
New York, TalkAmerica, Telemundo, BBC,
The Breakfast Club, Caracol Radio
Network, ClearChannel, the Mike
Gallagher Show, and 1010WINS.
To interview Ruth Houston, please call
her at 718 592-6039. For more
information on infidelity, visit
http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com